Friday, 21 August 2009

Destiny? Spare Me!!!!!!!!!

The NRL, and in particular chief vazhin Gallop, whom I have long suspected of suffering from a major bout of plot loss have finally gone and proven that when it comes to ridiculousness, they are the kings. What is a DESTINY ROUND? I wish you could hear me say it because I sound like I am an announcer for a bad 70s game show......

"Hahaha, yes yes and welcome back. We are here with Mary Smith, a housewife and mother of four from Croydon. Congratulations Mary, you have just won the Black and Decker kitchen mixer, now with two speeds and linoleum cover. Now we move to the DESTINY ROUND where you will play for a new house built with James Hardies finest asbestos sheeting! As an expectant mother you can rest easy knowing you are being protected from the elements by asbestos. Remember folks, the DESTINY ROUND is sponsored by Craven A's, the cigarette most favoured by doctors!"

What is a DESTINY ROUND? Is it double points? Are the games played backwards? Is there an egg and spoon component to the game, no kicks for goal this weekend, DESTINY ROUND dictates that such things are predecided, Hollywood Harrigan will let you know once he reviews some footage. Will there be tarot card readers on the half way? Clairvoyants in the crowds ruining the odds on the market by revealing the winner? Will the teams have philosophical discussions at half time about what exactly constitutes a persons destiny, and whether there is such a thing a fate, before moving onto a discussion on free will and man's ability to alter the path of his life? Destiny refers to a predetermined course of events so why are we playing this round at all? If it is all predetermined why bother showing up? It is a concept based on the belief that there is a fixed natural order to the cosmos. So if you are destined to win you should be able to do that from home, feet up on the lounge with a cold one in hand. Stay home!!

DESTINY ROUND....what a crock. The name is so ridiculous we should rename the upcoming get together the Destiny Drink. And I can see our destiny, and we will be drunk as sailors on shore leave and laughing our heads off.

Wednesday, 12 August 2009


Well, its true I haven't blogged for a while, so I am a little rusty and actually a little unsure whether my entry is blog-worthy in this amazing sanctum. Anyway f*ck it, you have read this far so I guess you must be interested in my thoughts or all of the satellites have fallen out of the sky and there is nothing on the box.

I was listening to the news today and apart from the news about Greg 'I love fisting women, and not in the good way' Inglis I heard two news stories which pricked my interest. Well, they actually p*ssed me off. Here they are;

  1. Someone Kennedy died. Boo f*cking hoo. Someone related to a dead president of a country on the other side of our globally warming planet died and that makes our news???? Give me a f*cking break. I would rather listen to a seminar by Greg Bird and the aforementioned Mr Inglis on how to 'Keep Your Bitches In Line'.
  2. When did we start pronouncing Papua New Guinea properley? When I was at school we pronounced it PAP-YOU-A New Guinea, not as it is now PARPWA New Guinea. Maybe its now said correctly but I dont give a toss I like the old version. Say it with me PAP YOU A New Guinea. Takes you back too doesn't it? Dont even get me started on the f*ckers at Nestles/Nestle.

Thats all for now, I know it wasnt great, but hey you got it for free.